If This Was A Movie
by MoonWillow88
Summary: AU. Songfic of the song with the same name. I suck at summaries, but basically, this is about the untold canon story of Lily and Severus. How they came so close, yet were so far.


**If This Was A Movie**

Disclaimer : If it belonged to me, I would've killed off Voldemort in the first book and spend the rest of it giving Severus the best life ever. Same goes with the song. I'd bring them both back together. Taylor's evil. Listen to the song though. It's perfect; if a little heartbreaking.

Every day at Hogwarts was a nightmare. Like the living dead. Everyday she would trace his movements through the hall, watching his slumped back as he trudge through the corridors to his classes. Everyday she would run away, in lieu of watching helplessly, as he fell under the tormenting wands and jeers of the marauders, wanting to help but too fearful of his reaction. Everyday she would stare and glare and rage silently at his crouched form in the library, wishing everything was as before and she could take back her place by his side. If only he would just apologize.

_**Six months gone and I'm still reaching, even though I know you're not there**_

_Every day at Hogwarts was a nightmare. Like the living dead. Everyday he would trace her movements through the halls, watching her smile and laugh with her friends as she walked through the corridors. Everyday he would watch as she flees at the sight of him, disgusted as he writhed under the tormenting wands and jeers of the Marauders, his soul twisting at her obvious rejection. Everyday he would stare and glare and rage silently at himself in the library, wishing fervently that everything was as before and he could take his place by her side. If only he wasn't so scared of her rejection. _

_**Maybe I've been going back too much lately, when time stood still and I had you**_

...

Every night she would look out the window and see him pacing outside her house. Every night she would debate with herself, trying to muster up her Gryffindor courage and go to him, to forgive him for all that he'd done. Every night she would try so very hard to swallow her pride, her fears, her concern, and the incredulity that he went to the dark side. Every night she came so very close, closer than the night before, to forgive and forget, as she stares at the lone figure out in the cold empty street. But every night, she fails. Every night, she tells herself, promises herself, that tomorrow will be better. Every night, she kisses him goodnight from behind the curtains.

_**I know people change and these things happen, **__**But I remember how it was back then**_

_**Wrapped up in your arms and our friends were laughing, 'cause nothing like this ever happened to them**_

_Every night he would pace outside her house, keeping watch, battling his pride. Every night he would try to muster up his Slytherin cunning, and reason himself into going to her and apologise. Every night he would try so very hard to swallow his Slytherin Pride, his fears over her rejection, his fear over her disgust and go to her, asking for forgiveness. Every night he would succeed a little more, getting closer to the door, before his courage fails him, and he retreats again. Every night, he fails. Every night, he tells himself, promises himself, that tomorrow will be better. Every night, he waits for the light in her room to extinguish and kisses her goodnight in her dreams. _

_**Now I'm pacing down the hall chasing down your street, **_

_**Flashback to the night when you said to me**_

"_**Nothing's gonna change, not for me and you"**_

_**Come back, come back, come back to me like**_

_**You would, you would if this was a movie, **_

_**Standing in the rain outside till I came out**_

_**Come back, come back to me like **_

_**You could, you could if you just said you're sorry**_

_**I know that we could work it out somehow**_

_**But if this was a movie you'd be here right now**_

...

Godric's Hollow was completely silent when he reached, save for a few drunkards who stirred as he Apparated near them. The skies were bright with the fireworks of celebration, and the air was unusually warm for Halloween. But Severus noticed none of these as he frantically climbed the steps leading to the Potters.

Nothing was left.

_**Cause nothing's gonna change, not for me and you**_

_**Not before I knew how much I had to lose**_

He howled in despair, clutching the lifeless body to him as his regrets poured through him.

Memories flooded him. Lily chasing after him in the rain when they were kids. Lily holding her hands during the sorting. Lily hugging him when his mother died. Lily pushing him away when he uttered the hateful word.

Lily. Lily. Lily.

Come back, Lily, He cried wordlessly, Come back, Please!

_**Come back, come back, come back to me like**_

_**You would before you said it's not that easy**_

_**Before the fight, before I locked you out**_

_**But I take it all back now**_

The little boy on the crib has ceased crying at the sight of the older man sobbing on his mother's lifeless body. His lower lip wobbled as if he understood the man's pain. He still didn't understand why his mother wouldn't wake up and cradle him like she used to. He still didn't understand why the green light made her mother sleep. He still didn't understand why the house was so quiet and why his father hasn't come to wake his mother up. He didn't understand why this stranger was holding his mother. But he did understand that the man was hurting and that made him want to cry too.

He whimpered.

And by some miracle, Severus heard the whimper amidst his pain, and he tore his eyes away from Lily's lifeless body, only to fix it upon the same emerald eyes that had accompanied him for so many years. He reached out to the boy, picking him up and bringing him close, to him, to his Lily. The boy pushed his mother tentatively, confused when his mother didn't respond, and started to cry.

Severus tightened his hold around the boy, offering comfort to both himself and the young child. He wiped away the child's tears and vowed to keep him safe.

_For Lily._

This time, he wouldn't fail her.

_**So, if you're out there, if you're somewhere, if you're moving on**_

_**I'll be waiting for you ever since you've been gone**_

Severus wrapped the child closer into his own deep robes. He brought the child closer to the prone body on the floor, allowing the child to grasp at his mother's limp arm while he carefully arranged Lily's body to a comfortable position, pressing each of her eyes close with soft kisses. Then, with a final glance at the destroyed room, he gathered the child and disApparated.

**The End. **

**End Notes : I'm sorry if the shifting perspectives confused you. The italics are Severus's perspective, while the bold italics are lyrics from the song. Hope you liked it! Review please; they make cotton candies even sweeter. =)**


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